The infidelity chat room has been and continues to be a place where those coping with infidelity in their marriage or relationship find crucial support and encouragment.
Sleepless nights are productively spent sometimes using this tool.
I seldom venture in to the chat room. The value of the room is for peers to learn and support each other.
Here are some responses to the my inquiry about the chat room:
1. List 2-3 ways the Chat Room has played a significant part in your “recovery.”
>>>>Being heard. Not alone.
>>>>1. Talking to others helps to put things in perspective. Sadly, someone always has it worse than I do. 2. Speaking to others helps to get my thoughts organized, and after writing something, makes you see your own issues more clearly. 3. The friendships.
>>>>Its a reality check and makes me see how I try to cover for my mate. The discussions make me feel like i am not alone.
>>>>Gave you someone to talk to who was going through the same thing. Others who had gone through it for years were the most helpful. It helped make you feel like you weren’t alone, and going crazy.
>>>>Someone there to talk to Good advice new ideas support from everyone.
>>>>It has helped me find my way after a trying experience.
2. What are a couple pieces of advice you would give a newbie to the Chat Room?
>>>>get it all on the table…valuable info in the wisdom of others
>>>>1. Make sure you tell your story, we’ve heard it all (or so it seems) and there is no shame in this room. 2. If possible, listen to both hurt and offending parties, it helps gain perspective.
>>>>Listen first before jumping in as it helps to see what is being discussed. it also gives the ones chatting time to get to their point.
>>>>Take your time its on your side Read the E books. Set boundaries for spouse.
>>>>Sit and listen. Not everyone’s advice will suit your situation, so to relax, and watch others talk first.
My husband and I have been together for 3 years and married for 1. I feel like the biggest idiot on the face of the earth. Ive been walking around for 3 years thinking we were the perfect soul mates ..on cloud 9….Boy was I blind. On a recent trip to Berlin it just so happened that he was chatting with his mom and of course i ended up speaking with her because he thinks she’s longwinded. By the end of the conversation I turned to give him the phone but he had fell asleep. Well not thinking much of it I hung up his cell and was ready to lay down myself when I notice an app for a popular dating site right there dead center of the phone. i went into it and discovered several sexual conversations exchanged between him and other women. I was devastated i couldn’t breath, my hand was shaking, I could barely hold the phone. On top of that there was one conversation from abt 2 months prior of him and a woman making plans to meet up and then the next day she messaged him and asked him if he had enjoyed the day before and asked him to rate it on a scale from 1 to 10….he gave her a 10.5…..I instantly felt like my life was ripped out of me. On top of it all I’m 7 months expecting ou first child together that we were both just sooo excited about. I truly thought we were so happy I would’ve never thought out of everything Ive been through and how much I loved and cherished this man, that he would ever defy our union. We are Christians and he has always treated me like a queen and the most important thing to him since I’ve known him. I get people straying when miserable and unhappy….but how does it happen when your happy? I would’ve never ever even entertained the idea of another mans company because my husband was truly everything that i needed, and he reciprocated the feeling. On top of all this he’s denying that he’s ever physically slept with anyone and he says he’s very happy in our marriage and doesn’t want to lose his family but I just feel if he would do this to me when he’s supposed to be “happy” what will he do when we hit a rough patch. I love him unconditionally so i have chosen to work at it but its just so hard to give trust again and be made a fool out of